Do all epic love stories have tragic endings? Look at Romeo and Juliet. There were 5 deaths. Antony and Cleopatra both end up dead. Then there's the story of Dido and Aeneas; I could identify with Dido a couple years back. Both in the Christopher Marlowe and Virgil versions of the story it is a depiction of unrequited love. She gives him everything, he swears he loves her, marries her, then leaves her because Destiny is calling him elsewhere. Let's see, what other epic couples are there? Tristan and Isolde were the precursors to Guinevere and Lancelot. These two couples were never meant to be but somehow were. Hero and Leander; Leander would swim every night across the strait and Hero would set up a lantern in her tower to guide his way, but one night a storm came, blew out the light, and drowned him and she jumped from her tower in grief.
Is it because the lovers must die to be together that makes these stories epic and the love so profound? Is it because we somehow associate happy endings with easy, frivolous, and passionless love? How many times have you gone to see a romantic comedy and at the end thought to yourself "That doesn't happen in real life." Aside from the fact that it's a movie, why do we compare our love to that of Romeo and Juliet's which had a tragic ending instead of say...a Disney prince and princess where there is a happily ever after? Maybe it's because the men don't really show up until the end, after the woman has suffered and endured so much for her love. Have you ever noticed that? We never get the guy's perspective. It's always the woman dreaming of her love and waiting for him to just kind of show up, meanwhile she's dealing with family issues, identity issues, living situations, etc. and then her dream love shows up and takes her away and all the problems go away. For once, I would love to see a love story from the guy's perspective because I always wonder, when guys have a crush on a girl, what do they do? Do they think about her? Do their hearts start beating crazily when they see her go by? Do they hope that she'll look at them? Do they think about how they're going to tell her? I would write the story, but I'm not a guy, so I don't know how guys think. I would love my male readers' input on this and maybe I will write the first ever Disney prince story. I'll actually give him a real name, not Prince Charming.
From my perspective when I have a crush on a girl I am quite shy around her. I have yet to feel my heart ever start thumping within my chest due to just the sight of a girl I had a crush on. I personally do not hope they will look at me, I just kind of like to stay unknown. I just also don't have the balls to tell them anything.
ReplyDeleteA lot of guys are capable of just going right out and saying how they feel, asking a girl out, and getting it over with. I am sure guys feel the same about girls for the most part as girls feel about guys. There's a lot of guys that can get the job accomplished easily but it is not so much a crush as just wanting to get in the girls pants and ditch her.
Thank you for your input.
ReplyDeleteTo all the other guys out there, please comment and tell me how YOU act/feel when you have a crush on a girl.
Well, to answer your question, I... don't.
ReplyDeleteIf there's one thing I've learned about myself over the past few months, it's my absolute lack of initiative. I always waited to see if the girl would be interested in me. This is apparently a bad thing, and I'm trying to change this attitude.
If there's a girl that I like, I'll generally go out of my way to become friends with her, learn about her interests, hang out, etc.. But the mistake I seem to make that other guys don't is that I wait until we're best friends before I think about asking her out. It seems that best friends can never be lovers (as I myself unhappily learned last year!)
Oh, and half of the time, the girls I like already have boyfriends. I don't enjoy crashing into other people's relationships.
Also, I consider myself to have feminist views. If I ever have mutual love with someone (big if there), I'd take it really damn seriously and not just consider short-term benefits as other guys would (as Rshoebk says).
Yeah, big mistake to become best friends with a girl then try and ask her out. I don't know why we do this but once a guy is in our best friend column, we cannot see them any other way. I know that I treat my best friend like I would a girl-friend (making him seem gay when he's really not.)
ReplyDeletePlease, someone answer me this though, because this is what drives me crazy about guys: Why is it that sometimes you'll start to avoid us? Like you'll be flirting with us for a few weeks and it really seems that you like us but then you disappear without reason. I never could understand that and it drives me and every other girl I know crazy. (A peek into our minds) "Was it something I said? Does he not like me anymore? Is he just a douche? Was he just messing around?"
I'd finally love an answer! Thank you so much for the responses.
Aha. This I can answer. It's generally not the fault of the girl, it's usually one of these factors:
ReplyDelete1. The guy is looking for an easy relationship and thus holding the girl to some impossibly high standard, which if not met in a specific time span (as you say, a few weeks), he'll leave. This can be determined by his pattern of behavior.
2. He is flirting with multiple other girls at the same time. This can be ruled out by finding out by observing him if he is in fact doing this (he'll never tell you honestly).
3. The guy is just being a dick and testing the girl to see how much she really likes him. Something along the mentality of, "If you really miss me, you'll be calling me every single day asking me to come back."
4. The guy is being emo and assuming that no one will ever love him. Not likely, since if the guy is assertive to go out and flirt in the first place, he's probably not the type to lock himself in his room and listen to Fall Out Boy until he falls into a teary-eyed sleep.
And guys complain about girls not being straightforward?
ReplyDeleteI personally find this to be really odd. Because all of my relationships have started off as best friends and they went great while they lasted. And when I like a girl I have pretty much the same actions and views about other guys as Rshoebk. I'm pretty shy about it and tired of douchebags who just want some. There's more to life than losing your virginity when you should try and wait anyway.
ReplyDeleteDo you guys feel pressured at all to have sex by a certain age?
ReplyDeleteMe personally heck no, but apparently there's a bunch of people at my school who don't think it's a big deal whatsoever and want to do it by the time they are 15 or 16 cuz "it's cool" and junk like that, when it's a big deal and they should wait if they can. It's not something you can ever take back really
ReplyDeleteHow would you define 'masculinity'? What makes a man a man (besides the parts)?
ReplyDeleteMAN IS NOTHING MORE THAN A MISERABLE PILE OF SECRETS!
ReplyDeleteOuch that is harsh. Please explain.
ReplyDeleteENOUGH TALK! HAVE AT YOU!
ReplyDeletePlease do not spam my blog.
ReplyDeleteDracula iz trollin'.
ReplyDeleteAnd Mr. Dracula, have at "thee" sounds much cooler. You're undead and stuff. You need to go with the fancy talk.
btw, momo, ees victoria. :D caaaaaaall me.