Is it better to love fully and deeply despite the possibility of getting hurt or is it better to guard feelings jealously and only give love away in small fractions but never give it all? I should clarify and state that when I say 'love' I mean it in the most general sense; love for a friend, a family member, another human being even. I don't mean the weak-kneed, heart pounding, butterfly kind of love, but rather a desire to forge a connection with someone. A few experiences have demonstrated to me that it might be wiser to refrain from opening my heart and giving love to get love in return. True, it is foolish to hope for reciprocated sentiments but should it be actively discouraged? Should we deliberately be more suspicious of people and only be courtious to those around us and offer some of our emotions and love to a very select group of people? This would certainly give more value to love acquired from a person of that philosophy. As the old saying goes 'easy come easy go' therefore by extension, whatever comes with difficulty must be worth more.
Perhaps it is fear that keeps most people from ever being able to open themselves up for the kind of love that is so trusting of the basic good in the vast majority of people. A love of man springs from the belief that most people are basically well-intentioned and not out to harm those around themselves. I know that if I had to go back to those points in my life where it might have been wiser to refrain from being so open and loving I wouldn't change anything. I would still open my heart to people because I always think of the archetypal Wise Man. So full of love and compassion and trust; so child-like and innocent, never being jaded by the bad in the world. I know I won't always get the love and connection that I try to make, but at least I made the effort and maybe, just maybe, that person will remember me for it. I think the Beatles said it best "And in the end, the love you take is equal to the love you make". Or think the ending scene in the movie Bugsy Malone; the last chorus was used in a Grand Theft Auto-style Coca-Cola commercial that premeired in the 2007 Super Bowl
"You give a little love
And it all comes back to you
(Da da da ra da da da)
You know you gonna be remembered
For the things you say and do
(Da da da ra da da da)"
Introducing the new Weaponized Culture
11 years ago
Bravo, your take on both ends of love are well justified. On one side you speak on the risks and benefits of reluctance to open up, while on the inverse you speak on your personal past dealing with love, but why would you opt to leave your past love life the same? Was there nothing you could had deemed unnecessary? To opt for the ideal of child-like innocence could be seen as foolish in the world we live in. With so many people out to harm you emotionally one would think to save yourself from such previous heartache if you could. Was everything that happened detrimental in your current understanding of love? Or was it merely a coincidence, something strung together by chance? Nevertheless your take on love has struck a chord with me, and will give me much to reflect on.
ReplyDeleteWell, I wouldn't change anything about my past love life because to change anything, no matter how small, would lead you to a different place. I know I wouldn't be the same person I am now if I had made different decisions. If I love someone, I'm going to love them with all my heart, that way in the end, I could say 'I gave it my all. It just wasn't meant to be.' You'll find plenty of relationships like that; the first one is rarely ever the last. I'm not particularly religious but I think you might find this useful
ReplyDeleteGod puts people in our lives sometimes only for a REASON. They serve their purpose in our lives, or we serve a purpose in theirs. Once that reason is fulfilled, they leave. Other times it's for a SEASON. You grow apart, you change, they change, it's not because they didn't care about you or that you didn't care about them, or that it was a mistake being friends or lovers, it's just that the time was up. And sometimes, people are put in your life FOREVER. These are the people that will always be with you.
I hope you find what you're looking for and I hope that you don't give up on love no matter what happens. Love always finds a way around the coldest and hardest of hearts. Let love manifest itself in your life and you'll see its power.
Good luck.